Greenwood/Elk columns

May 4 ~ July 27, 1989

May 4th.

A story about VW Busses.

Around nine years ago, in Seattle, back when I was recently divorced and had my kids every other weekend, there was a running argument about who got to ride in front with dad. I had a Datsun pick-up at the time. One day at work, one of the guys mentioned he wanted to sell his 1967 VW bus. We ended up trading vehicles.

Now the argument was, who gets to ride in the front seat with dad, but at least we were all under one roof. Six months later I took a job in Los Angeles and had to leave my kids with my ex-wife. I packed my stuff in the bus, tied my kayak on top and headed for the big city.

I lived in that '67 bus, down in L.A., out in the company parking lot for six months. I was working ten hours a day, seven days a week. There was a cafeteria and shower at work, a good Mexican restaurant just down the street. Living in the bus made a lot of sense to me.

Whenever I did get a few days off I was gone, out exploring the southern California deserts.

One time, trying to get up a boulder strewn dry wash, miles off the real road, the main pivot assembly for the steering tore loose. Fortunately I had my kayak repair kit with me. I jacked the steering assembly back into place, wrapped it all with fiberglass strips and resin and camped for the night. As it turned out, the fiber glass patch was probably the strongest point on that bus.

Another time, out in Joshua Tree, the starter motor quit. I had a spare with me.

One time I drove around for two days, in L.A. traffic, with a broken clutch cable. These things are possible. On one of my three trips to Baja, the number one spark plug blew out of its hole. I pulled off into the sage brush and installed a helicoil. Earlier, when I had checked the plugs, I had noticed number one didn't tighten up quite right so I had brought a helicoil kit along just in case.

I ran out of gas one time, dumped in a gallon of Coleman Stove fuel, then drove on to the closest gas station.

Oh yeah. I replaced the generator in a parking lot in Bakersfield, next to the parts house.

Nine years of trouble free motoring, basically. When ever there was trouble it was always interesting and something I could handle.

On my last trip to the desert, number three intake valve kept tightening up. One thousand miles into the trip and a thousand miles from home, I had finally run out of valve clearance adjustment. There I sat, out in Death Valley, pondering the situation. What to do. What to do. I finally spaced the rocker assembly out with a couple of flat washers and was able to nurse the bus on home.

But yeah, it's finally terminal. Probably the valve seat going away but more than that, the rust has finally taken over. The engine is fixable but the frame is gone.

I'm going to pull out the engine and any good stuff and a friend is going to use the body for a chain saw storage shed.

We had a lot of fun, my '67 bus and I, but now it's time to put it down. At least I don't have to have it crushed.

PS. I just bought another bus. One year newer, a '68. It looks like my engine will fit.

May 11th.

First off. Let me announce, "ELK IS FULL!"

No more room. We're standing in line at the Elk Store and we are standing in line for tables at the Roadhouse Cafe! Enough already!

The restoration crew is in place, working on our Post Office building, the former lumber mill office.

They are going to put a new foundation under it, scrap and patch the walls and fix the windows. Eventually the building will become our museum.

The State Parks folks touched up the 'highway' to our beach. They re-ditched the drains into the culverts so the mud has subsided. Overall, I must admit it looks better but I still think it was excessive.

I'm getting phone calls at 6:30 in the morning from our Baseball Commissioner, "Baby Doc" Bill Edison. It seems he is working himself into a lather over the upcoming Pepper Martin Baseball Extravaganza, which doesn't even happen until the end of this month. Already he has sent out a flyer berating the locals to attend. I'll be so glad when he finally makes his annual pilgrimage back to Martha's Vineyard and we will all be able to sleep in again.

Kindergarten registration will be taking place at Greenwood School the week of May 15, 17 and 18, Monday, Wednesday and Thursday from 2 until 3. If your child will be 5 by December 2nd, 1989, she/he may attend Kindergarten in September. Please bring proof of birth and immunization record.

If these times don't work for you, please contact Jane Corey at the school and make alternative arrangements. The school phone number is 877-3361. It is extremely helpful to the school to have an accurate enrollment projection.

Reminder. May 20th 4 - 6, Greenwood School Arts Festival at the Greenwood Community Center.

Mr. Huckaby showed me the 30th Anniversary issue A&E, 'hot off the press'. Talk about rising from the ashes! Like Joe Bob says, 'Check it out'!

This Friday, May 12th at 8 PM, Elk's own Kate Dougherty and Kathleen Lignell, who is from Maine, will present their poetry, 'Two Voices - One Ocean', at the Mendocino Art Center. The $3.00 donation will benefit Judith Vidaver's multi - image production 'Ocean Sanctuary', a project to enlist national support for ocean protection.

Seems like I'm forgetting something but I guess it will have to wait a week.

Onward through the fog.

May 18th.

The First Coast Youth Girls Soccer League season was completed May 13. Mendo Monsters, with Greenwood/Elk girls Liza Matson, Megan Pederson and Selena Barnett finished undefeated! They were coached by Dean Pederson.

In adult soccer, Claudia Pederson played with a fractured ulna (broken arm), in the finals of the 1st Humboldt Cup, last weekend, May 5,6, and 7th. Unfortunate loss of 3 - 2 for Mendocino Coast United, our coed team.

Reminder. The Greenwood School invites the Community to and Arts Festival Saturday May 20th, 4 - 6:30 at the Community Center. Here is the approximate schedule for the programs.

4:00 - 4:45 Painting, drawing, and sculpture on display.

5:00 Singing.

5:25 Folk dance.

5:50 Plays.

The festival reflects the work done throughout the school year. We hope you will take this opportunity to become more familiar with our Arts Program. The children are very excited about sharing their work with you. Please come.

I received a letter concerning an item in last week's column.

"Dear Ron. I promise to stop the early morning phone calls if you write a decent column about "Pepper Martin Day". After all, it is the first time we have combined baseball with barbecue.

Have you ever delved into the history of this famous Saint Louis Cardinal ball player? Do you know he got more applause than President Herbert Hoover at the 1931 World Series and his favorite song, "The Wabash Cannon Ball" was substituted for the National Anthem?

Anyway, at this year's event, Dick Mitchell has promised to throw out the first ball. Roff Barnett and Bob Matson will be cooking up a storm with hot dogs and hamburgers. The bar chieftain, Vince Carleton, is practicing up on his Margarita recipe and a new children's drink will be offered called, Big Red! The entire Greenwood/Elk community is bringing salads.

All moneys raised from the barbecue will be for the Greenwood/Elk Summer Children's program.

It has been rumored that a ball, autographed by Cardinal short stop Ozzie Smith will be given to the Pepper Martin winner. This has induced Gerry Huckaby to come out of retirement and even Carole Raye is sharpening her spikes.

Play ball, I say.

Signed: The Greenwood/Elk Baseball Commissioner, 'Baby Doc' Edison.

Your columnist responds:

Sorry Bill, I haven't got the space in my column. I need to write about my recent sighting of Pelicans. Last Saturday, May 14th, a flight of eleven Pelicans were spotted cruising north into a brisk 30 to 40 mile per hour headwind. Not once did I see then flap their wings, yet they were moving right along. A truly amazing sight.

May 25th.

I was down on our beach, throwing the stick for the dog when I discovered 'news' happening.

Mary Moran came running by, which isn't unusual, but he didn't have that 'jogger aura' about him. He ran to the south end of the beach where I then noticed a person about ninety feet up the cliff face. A rescue operation was in progress.

Soon, Charlie Acker, Steve Acker, Roff Barnett, Lee McKnight, Ron Karish and Kevin Joe appeared on the top of the bluff.

In time, a rope was thrown over the edge and Kevin Joe rappelled down and over to the stranded climber. Kevin then installed a second harness on the 'victim' who's name we later discovered was Peter and, after attaching more rope, Kevin was then able to assist the climber in retracing his route back down to the beach and his waiting friends.

I discovered the climber had been hanging on for two hours, three by the time he was finally back on terra ferma.

Afterwards, Gary and I talked about naming the south bluff, Peter's Bluff, in honor of the visiting climber from Belgium. The troops on the hill retrieved the ropes, Kevin gave Peter a citation, a little memento of his visit to Greenwood/Elk and my dog and I headed on home.

I happened to run across a new radio station the other day. It reminds me of KKSF, which I enjoyed when hauling urchins to the city, back when. Hardly any commercials and a lot of Pat Metheny. 105.9 FM. KMRJ Ukiah. Check it out.

There was a good turnout for the Children's Art Program. The Community Center was completely decorated with various art projects. I missed the main event but was able to enjoy the posters still on the walls after the fact.

Congratulations all 'round for a job well done.

So far, I have received three letters from my High School 30th year class reunion committee. I've ignored them all until I happened to notice an attached page; "Missing Classmates"!

I see that I am fourth on the list. Scanning on through the list I see that it is mostly made up of 'the nerds'. Now a reunion of nerds I could get excited about. I bet they are now rocket scientists, computer hackers, political activists or car painting/columnists, like myself.

I also noticed the reunion committee requests folks to come in their fifties get ups. I'd be a winner, arriving in my 1961 Ford Falcon, pulling my 1959 Airstream trailer, wearing my 1960's suit, tie and beard. It would be great until they realized I didn't rent any of it. This is my life. This is me. Thirty years later and still a nerd.

The Pepper Martin Baseball Extravaganza happened in Elk last weekend. See the photo, elsewhere in this edition of the Beacon, and read all about it in next months A&E, the reason being, since it didn't seem to have any purpose, it must be Art.

June 1st.

The old John Chamberlain sign, over the entrance to the Elk Store has been completely restored and lovingly enhanced by Judy Hale. It is, as the Fort Bragg School teachers say, "Wooooonderfullll". Also, a direction finder pole has been erected at the southwest corner of the building. Now with only a glance the tourists can see how much further it is to $pendocino or Beijing. I'm told the erection of a new bulletin board is next.

I have noticed the facade of our Post Office/Former Mill Office, becoming straighter. I stopped by for an up date.

The crew is putting in a new foundation in stages. The southern third of the building has been supported and leveled. Dirt was excavated to accept a footing pour which has rebar embedded in it.

After that set, forms were installed on the footing for the foundation while rotted floor joists were cut out. New ones stubbed in, braced and shimmed at the right height. The space between the floor joists and the top of the foundation pour will be just enough to accept the plate. If you appreciate this kind of work, the job they are doing is beautiful.

Mark, the leadman, told me the southwest corner of the building was down seven inches and no, no bodies or artifacts have been found.

New wiring is going in but they will try to stay with the old time light fixtures.

I find that he and the crew specialize in old restorations. One of their previous jobs was the old hospital building in Eureka, which they lifted, turned and moved back to its former location and restored. They have also done a lot of work in the old gold mining towns of California.

"The Greenwood/Elk Children's Summer Program will be held on Wednesday from 10:30 until 2:00, starting June 21st through August 23rd. We will be offering arts and crafts, sports activities, nature walks and a lot of creative fun. Children will need to bring a lunch.

Thank you for joining us for the Pepper Martin Baseball game and barbecue. Your support was appreciated. For more information call Jane Lewis 877-3214."

As I write this, the Memorial Day weekend is almost upon us. Already there have been two head on car crashes with in five miles of Elk. This might be a good weekend for a hike in the hills, far from the maddening crowd.

News Flash!

Cherry Young has returned from her travels to L.A. She was impressed by the bright lights, big city. She has decided Greenwood/Elk needs some culture, obviously missing the point entirely.

Remember, as Joe Bob says, "Eternal Vigilance". It could happen here.

June 9th.

It is the morning after the night before. If you were at Casper Inn for C.J. Chenier's 'Red Hot Louisiana Band' you know what I mean. Straight forward, maximum dancing, honest music with very short breaks. A full house and a great time was had by all.

During one of the breaks I got to talk to Jan Wax and Chris Bing a little bit about KZYX. They are putting together a World Beat' music program for Saturday between 10 and 2 AM, if I remember right. Jan said the station will be conducting low power tests this month and the station will be on the air in early July. Since the transmitter will be up on Signal Ridge, we should be able to get this public station right here in Elk. I'm looking forward to it.

Backing up a bit, I went to the opening at the new Mendocino Art Center Showcase, formerly Bill Zacca's, Bay Gallery, before I went to Casper Inn.

Among the items shown was a painting by Judy Hale. It is called Elk at Night., or maybe, Elk in Night. All I know is it visually hit me. This painting, to my mind, really captured something about Elk that you can only see if you actually live here for a while or happen to catch that rare night when passing through.

What I see in her painting is the rising white moon through the black Greenwood hills, reflected green moonlight on the shore below and the red dying heat of the day above. Four colors in what appears to be as many strokes and wham. magic!

I want it. Fortunately, my trailer is too small.

The unfortunate closing of Molfino's did benefit the Roadhouse Cafe in case you are wondering where all the tables and chairs came from.

Mel Matson is back in the hospital. A possible stroke has temporarily blinded him. He is still ornery and wants to go home but they are going to keep him five days in Fort Bragg for observation.

The amazing rain we have had these last two weekends has really put the finishing touches on this years crop of flowers and shrubs. I forget how green it can get around here. Also, I hear a lot of bird calls that I didn't realize were missing. Must be summer now.

Every Sunday afternoon, at 2:00 there is pick up softball games at the 'stadium' out behind the Elk Garage. Come on out for a good time. Bring your glove.

Gina Urbani informed me the Edmund Justi passed away. Ed was born April 10th, 1909. Old timers will recall he was the foreman at the Goodyear Lumber Company, here in town.

He left Greenwood during the depression and moved to the San Joaquin Valley. There he started farming two hundred acres and experimenting with the idea of irrigation. By 1979, when he retired and sold his farm, he had expanded to eight thousand acres and had eighty irrigation pumping stations.

Back in 1976 he learned that his former parish, the Church of the Blessed Sacrament, in Greenwood/Elk, one of the oldest churches in Northern California, was in need of restoration. His generous donation assisted in replacing the roof and windows and applying a new coat of paint.

On April 20th of this year, friends far and near, gathered to help him celebrate his 80th birthday. On May 17th he suffered a heart attack and "went out like a light". He was buried in Fresno, May 20th.

June 15th.

Another foggy day, the ocean is flat as a mirror. Herds of shiny cars, stuffed animals stuck on the windows, are out hunting and gathering. I sit hunkered down in my trailer, grasping for inspiration. Nothing so far.

I looked up my columns from the past two years on this date, hoping for something. No help. Is this the Ides of June or what? I'd say it's the calm before the storm, that we are teetering on the brink of something, but any fool can look out the window, here in Elk, and see that.

"Write what you know." Ah! There's my problem.

Well, let's see. Eijler Westh has a bad sore throat. Mel is still in the hospital being checked out. Bob Matson is installing a new hoist in the Elk Garage. Lolli is on the verge of kicking off the Tapestry Symposium. Steve and Connie Sinclair are in L.A. , taking care of 'Coach', who is terminally sick.

Marco, in his last column in the Mendocino Commentary wrote something I totally agree with.

"When you go to buy a car, open the hood. Without craning your neck, can you see the oil filter, the coil, the distributor and the spark plug wires all the way to the plugs? Can you see the ground past the motor? If not, it's no good. Also avoid a car with power anything, or electrical wires going into the carburetor. I don't care how sharp you are, you'll be sorry."

My 1961 Ford Falcon gets an A+ in all categories and I got it exactly for those reasons.

It seems to me that it all started to go wrong with television. Tee-Vee was the first appliance to come along that was a 'black box'. I could take it apart and look at it but it didn't make any mechanical sense. I could not figure it out. I couldn't fix it unless it was an obvious burnt out wire. If it broke I pretty much had to buy a new one no matter how much bailing wire and mechanical ability I possessed. Since then the ability to 'fix it' has steadily decreased. Just throw it away and buy a new one.

Okay. What else?

There are some culverts stored in various turn outs along the coast around here. Cal Trans must be getting ready for the main tourist season. And, as long as I'm picking on Cal Trans. Why o why are those curves past Little Guyserville and the South Navarro grade still not double striped? They double striped everything else. I asked that question in this column over a year ago. I guess it has to go into the unfinished business pile along with cable Tee Vee and the Elk water tank.

And since I'm wasting my time and yours too, why do we have to have a new post office at a new location?

Why can't it be relocated to the south end of the refurbished mill office? That's a great building. It is a central location. It looks like Elk, it is big enough for both a Post Office and Historical Museum. I for one don't want a standard issue building like Point Arena and Manchester and everywhere else.

And since I'm finally on a roll.

Charlie and Rosie Acker have a documentary video film of the Alaska oil spill you can borrow, 877-3474. A donation would be appreciated to help the person who made this film continue doing this type of important work..

June 22nd.

Good news! Bruce Herring's Bruce Bread is back in the Elk Store. I think it is the best bread I have ever tasted. I know it costs more, but we're talking REAL BREAD here, even better than mom used to make. I hope we can make Bruce's drive over the hill from Boonville worth his while.

Billy Matson blew into town, sporting his Miami Vice mustache, waited tables at the Roadhouse for a few days and then split for the quieter life in the bay area.

I got to see Carolyn Carleton's latest rug which she designed and wove for a home in New Jersey. It is spectacular, of course. She had it up at the Mendocino Art Center for a few hours of viewing before hauling it away to San Francisco for photography and shipping on to the East Coast.

Speaking of the Carletons. Vincent is the newest elected member of the Mendocino Art Center Board. Maybe he can form a car pool with Joan Gates, another board member and Gerry Huckaby, A&E editor, in their commute to Mendo.

Lewis Martin will be filling in for a while as Jazz pianist at the Greenwood Pier, Saturday evenings. I didn't even know he played the piano, most of the time he is immersed in computer - modem - techno - babble.

Speaking of Saturday evenings. Once a month, on the last Saturday of the month, 'Bert the Log Truck Driver' will be cooking Italian Dinners at the Roadhouse Cafe. Bert's specialty, I understand, is homemade Ravioli. I called Sue Matson to find out Bert's last name. She didn't know. All she knew was that he has been coming in for breakfast for quite a while during his hauls through town and one day he said he wanted to cook Italian dinner. So, this Saturday, June 24th, Bert the Log Truck Driver will be holding forth.

See you there.

Kristy Matson is pumping gas while Mel takes a rest at home. I stopped to see Mel. His spirits are up, his vision is a little better but he is still a bit disoriented. Aren't we all.

Belvie Rooks is having a rummage sale, Sunday, June 25th in front of the Huckaby House, just to the North of the Elk Store. Belvie said she is relying on Joseph Huckaby's superior abilities and organizational skills to help pull this off.

Ed Bird's team, the Manchester Giants, won the play off. They received a huge trophy which will be on display either in the Gas Station or the Roadhouse Cafe. Ed said that he really appreciated the local support and especially that of Bob Matson. Thanks to all for the successful season.

Speaking of Ed Bird. So far, this year, he has lost fourteen lambs and five ewes to a mountain lion. Gene Titus, the county trapper is working the problem.

Last fall, one of the local ridge dwellers heard what he thought was a woman screaming in the night. He figured it was a domestic battle on the property next door. Not wanting to butt in, he turned up the radio and tried to ignore it.

Soon, there was a pounding on his door. It was his next door neighbor, gun in hand, wanting to know what the hell he was doing to his girl friend.

It was then they realized it was a mountain lion they had been hearing, down in the gulch between their properties Both men agreed it was enough to make your hair stand on end.

June 29th.

Last Friday morning, while sitting in the Roadhouse Cafe, Burt the log truck driver, pulled up in his big rig and hustled in for breakfast. I asked him how the preparations for his Italian dinner was coming along. He said he had a haul to Ukiah to finish, then another one to Fort Bragg. He was hoping to get back early enough to get the sauce going. He said that the word was getting out over the 'CB' channel. Various drivers calling him up and asking what time dinner would be. I told him I sure was looking forward to the event.

Saturday afternoon, around three, I dropped by the Roadhouse Cafe to check out the situation. Sue was rushing around wondering where Bert was. She was getting nervous.

I wandered on home and awaited the arrival of Lolli, while considering my options in case Bert didn't show. There is always the Wharf, fourteen miles South in Point Arena or Captain Flints, twenty five miles to the North in Fort Bragg. But I really had my heart set on Italian.

Finally around seven, Lolli arrived and we headed over to the Roadhouse Cafe for the big event, or non- event.

My concerned was eased, upon arrival, when I saw a bunch of cars clustered up in the heart of our little town. Only two tables were available. We grabbed the one by the window and settled in. Mel and Jane Matson and Margaret Feliz were seated next to us. Mel's first big outing since his troubles began. They were finishing dessert and said the dinner was wonderful.

Theresa Chitwood brought the menu, we ordered some wine and settled down to business. There was spaghetti and meatballs, of course, chicken and cheese ravioli and something called Malfatti. We decided on the 'half and half', Chicken Ravioli and Malfatti. Our salads arrived, I excused myself and ducked into the kitchen to see how Bert was doing.

There he was, hovering over some huge stainless kettles, adjusting the flame, stirring this and that, steam swirling around. His apron declared; 'Hot. tempting. Luscious.'." I said that this must be a different view from the one he normally has from his truck. He said it sure was, but he liked it. Then the kitchen staff chased me out of the kitchen.

Oh well. The proof would be in the pudding, or, in this case, the sauce.

More folks arrived and so did our main course. We dug in.

I had my note pad at the ready, awaiting comments from Lolli who definitely knows her cooking. Silence reigned for several minutes. Finally she looked up at me and said, "That boy knows how to cook".

We were on a roll. Soon she said that the sauce was "Swell". And a bit later, that the ravioli dough was "Nicely aldente", something to do with the tooth, I understand.

Towards dessert, a beaming Bert came out and mingled for a while. Kisses and hugs were in order at various tables. We discovered that the dough and the sauce was homemade. This here was real cooking.

Burt, his wife Halli (certified massage practitioner and Fort Bragg meter maid), and Jean Lemon had spent many hours making two hundred chicken ravioli, one hundred cheese ravioli and one hundred twenty Malfatti, not to even mention Bert's wonderful apple crisp dessert.

Too soon, we had to leave and make room for more arriving folks.

A walk out to the point behind the post Office and a little digestion, while watching the sun set into the ocean, put the finishing touches on a splendid event.

Already, we are looking forward to the last Saturday of next month when Bert the log truck driver will once again climb down from his rig and perform his magic. I just hope the word doesn't get out.

July 5th.

Del Wilcox has been batching it for a couple of days while his wife, Prue, has been off doing whatever it is that Prue does, when away. He gave me his secret survival recipe and told me I could share it with you all. Clip this out and paste to your refrigerator door.

----------

Del's Dinner Delight

One can of corned beef hash.

Two eggs dumped on top.

Microwave for four minutes, exactly.

Yummy.

-----------

Del also pointed out that the resurfacing of our multipurpose court seems to be successful this time. The recent rain didn't puddle up.

Peter Talbert showed me part of the project he is currently working on. It is a hand pushed cart that he is planning to take with him on a Peace Walk, starting this coming January. It is basically a support vehicle containing sleeping quarters and clothing/food storage. He is experimenting with a solar panel on top that will power a VCR he will be using to document the walk.

At this point he is using the solar panel to charge a deep cycle battery that lights up a globe of the world he has suspended inside his window on the west end of the Force Ten Office. You can see this display when you drive up Lousia Street at night. He said it is a statement of his hope for the future; "A clean, safe, method of bringing light to a world in darkness".

Greenwood/Elk is being represented at the "California Works" show at the State Fair, by local artist Steve Garner with his painting of our Historic Post office. Anyone going to the fair, between August 18th and September 4th, can check it out. Steve also has work in the Mendocino Art Center "Members" Show, currently being shown in Mendocino.

Speaking of Mendocino, I was attempting to drive through that 'pristine' town the other day, waiting at an excavation site, when the thought struck me; How is it that it takes more than an act of Congress to change the color of a Mendocino house, yet the power lines are being buried without a peep?

Are not the poles, power lines and phone lines part of the 'venue' of this historic, quaint, American village? Do they not stand in mute testimony to the arrival of rural electrification, lo so many years ago. Do they not indicate the arrival of Dr. Graham Bell's magic and the shrinking of spaceship earth, hence giving us a sense of community, near and far and, most especially I ask, how can this be happening to the subject matter of a host of camera toters, easel packers and VCR aficionados?

Let us stop to consider the loss.

Observe the majestic sweep of twisted wires, stretching from ceramic insulator to house, again and again, putting in plain view the interconnectedness that binds each to the whole. Please consider the repeated vertical statement of randomly placed poles, contrasting with the strong horizontal line of the Pacific Ocean. Note the capriciousness of the massive gray transformers, ethereal in fog, yet bold in silhouette against the Mauve sunset.

And what about the birds?

Soon, all will be gone and apparently, happily so. Without comment. One step closer to Solvang.

Incredible.

July 13th.

I would like to say thanks to Steve and Charlie Acker for wrestling with the town water system these past couple of weeks. There was a break in the line up by the tanks a few weeks ago and soon after that was repaired, another leak developed just down the hill from it. Then a few days later the crew putting in the culverts backed over the line by the elementary school. We have basically had trouble free water for the past year or so, then, boom, a rash breaks out.

It's one of those situations where, when everything is going right we don't give it a second thought, but when we turn on the faucet and nothing comes out, Steve and Charley sure hear about it. Well, anyway. Thanks Steve and Charlie.

I'm going to keep this column real short this time. I'm off to have my head shrunk this weekend. I'm starting out with a size seven and three eighths. I'm gonna try to get down to a six and three quarters. Victor Biando will oversee the process. If you know Victor, you know what I am talking about. If not, well...

July 20th.

Regarding last weeks short column:

Folks have asked me if I did indeed get my head shrunk. Yep. I also got my barnacles scraped.

It may not sound like fun but you'd be amazed.

I have noticed, over the years, that I tend to get hardening of the arteries, kind of stove up, mean spirited and sluggish toward my lovers, friends and life in general. I have found it very beneficial to stop, now and then, and take stock.

A Victor Biando weekend does just that. He hauled me out of the sea of life, scraped off my barnacles, applied a fresh coat of paint, splashed me with champagne and set me down the ways; back into the sea of life. Once again I am fast and dangerous. Look out!

So. What has changed?

Everything and nothing.

I noticed Highway One is still not double striped on that blind curve between Cameron Road and Little Guyserville, yet the other day I idled along behind the Cal Trans road striping crew as they passed through the area.

I'm still wondering why it is that our post office can't be in our post office? Why do we have to have a new generic building built somewhere else when the very building that IS our post office is being refurbished, brought up to code, will have the room, has the parking space, fits in with the 'historic ambiance', etc.

I'm told the reason is the Post Office Bureaucracy and the State Park Bureaucracy don't get along with each other.

Note: Random House College Dictionary states:

"bureaucracy... government characterized by rigid hierarchy of bureaus, administrators and petty officials."

I guess that explains it.

As long as the thrill of last weekend is wearing off and I am becoming more depressed;

It seems to me that back when coastal land prices were low, the area attracted the type of folks who didn't have much except sharing and caring, open door policy, live and let live, and love. Now the land prices are high and the area attracts 'big bucks' folks who bring with them chain link fences, mercury vapor 'security lights' and guard dogs.

As the various chunks of land sell, us non-moneyed folks who live in little cabins, trailers and lean-to's on cheap rent and with the good graces of the owner are being forced out, tossed out into a new cranked up coastal experience that requires a 'Beemer' and a million dollar, one bedroom house with a view.

"Get those hippies and rusty cars out of here. They don't fit in with the new $pendocino.

The other day, while I was sitting in the Roadhouse Cafe, a big maroon Cadillac pulled up, a huge man in white shorts, polo shirt, heavily trimmed gold rimmed sun glasses and Birkenstocks, walked in and asked the waitress, "How much farther to Caramel?".

The other day, while sitting in the Greenwood pier, listening to my friend Louis Martin play the piano, a woman in tourist safari clothes, at the table opposite Lewis asked the waiter, "Could you put on a Vivaldi tape?".

Like Victor Biando said, during the marathon weekend,

"Life is hard."

July 27th.

It is a sad day. Claudia Pederson has turned forty.

She is chiefly remembered for inventing the 'Claudia Scone', which can be purchased and enjoyed at the Roadhouse Cafe. Now, having passed the apex of her life, she has joined the rest of us in the long pointless struggle against gravity.

"Just say no, Claudia."

All registered voters who have not yet signed the Community Services District petition, please do so at the Elk Garage. We are now with in five percent of the required number of signatures. If you need transportation or a pep talk, Dave Brotherton at 877-3517 or Lee McKnight at 877-3230 are standing by to provide either.

Why are we so leery of the pronouncements of our elected officials and protection agencies? Isn't it their job to look out for our well being while we muck along doing our daily work.

If you don't want to think about such things, please don't read the three part series, "Annals of Radiation", in the June 12th, 19th and 26th issues, of all things, The New Yorker.

The series begins with one woman's accidental discovery of, what seemed to her, a connection between electromagnetic radiation from power lines and children's cancer. The articles then expand to include home appliances, electric blankets, video display terminals and on into the big boy toys; military radar installations and submarine communication arrays. As evidence starts stacking up that something is amiss, our officials started stacking up denial. It makes for some scary reading. Here's a taste:

"By the autumn of 1981, the presumption of benignity had been conferred upon electromagnetic emissions from the machines (in this case VDT's, Video Display terminals' by the arbitrators of a workmen's compensation proceeding; by the chiefs of NIOSH's Physical Agents Effects Branch and its Radiological Health; by scientists at the Public Health Service's Centers for Disease Control; by officials of OSHA and the Environmental Protection Agency (our ol' buddies); by the director of the Radiation Protection Bureau of Canada's Department of National Health and Welfare; by members of the Ontario Ministry of Labor and the Toronto Health Department; by hygienists and scientists at Harvard University, Duke University, the New York University Medical Center, and other leading academic institutions; Burt the log truck driver is cooking at the Roadhouse July 29th, see you there; by medical doctors from the Army's Environmental Hygiene Agency; by the medical directors of Air Canada and I.B.M.' by the president of the Computers and Business Equipment Manufactures Association; by representatives of virtually every VDT manufacturing corporation in the nation; by an official of the American Newspaper Publishers Association; by officers of the New York Times, the Toronto Globe and Mail and other major newspapers; and, finally by members of the National Academy of Sciences review panel."

I included the preceding paragraph just because it shows how high the pile of official - dumb can get and still be wrong!

Click here to continue.

Return to the Blabberon Homepage